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JOKES STATUS
1
John Jacob
Jingleheimer Schmidt has got to be one of my top 5 favorite songs
about
identity theft.
If I actually "spoke my mind", I'd be in deep trouble.
Half the time I agree with people so they'll shut
up.
When I laugh at jokes from the Internet, I don't actually laugh. I
just blow more air out
of my nose or mouth than usual.
I really need a day in between Saturday and Sunday.
Just checked my Farmville for the first time in a year. It's now a
Walmart.
Some people just lack the ability to laugh at themselves. That's
where I come in..
When people don't
laugh at my jokes I just assume that they're not up to my level
of
comedy..
You cannot talk while inhaling through your nose. LIKE if you
tried!
The annoying moment
when I get comfy in bed and realize I forgot to do
something.
LIKE if you had one
of those pens with a million colors, and tried to push all
the
buttons at once..
Having a sarcastic conversation with yourself when people are
ignoring you.
The problem with the world today is that the smart people are full
of doubts while the
stupid ones are full of confidence.
When the hostess at
the restaurant says “table for 2?” I always like to look
surprised
and whisper “you can see him too?”
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